Oh my God!
If Devon makes me go to one more noody beach, I'm gonna trick him into going to gay bar, dance him into the center of the room, and pants him!!! Actually, that sounds really fun, I might do that anyway.

The thing about topless beaches is that they're not as erotic as one would think. First of all, they're not called topless SUPERMODEL beaches, so you do the math! In fact, if I were to create a more accurate name for them, I'd call them topless SENIORS hangouts. Yeah.

Finding a hottie at a topless beach around here is like when you go to the junk yard hoping to find that one working autopart. Sure, it's doable, and at some point, there are a lot of working parts...but usually, you just get a bunch of rusted out throwbacks to the 70s.

Holy crap, I'm going to Hell after that rant, aren't I?

Hello in French!

I've been letting TJ do all the blog updating lately, so if you've read her site, you know we've been to Italy and France after our trip to Egypt and Greece. I've been busy getting over this horrible let down of a book I've been reading (Tremors).

Sorry, Craig Durgo, but since when is Italy to the east of Albania?? And he describes his leading lady's hot bod as "like two triangles stacked on top of each other." I'm getting goose bumps, really, There are also more em-dashes than an Emily Dickenson poem! This guy wrote Cussler books?

Anyway, about France...so far we've stayed on land. We took a bus to Paris (which was driven by a crazy Australian) and then got a museaum pass to see every museum in the city. Art is very cool. (that's my eloquent Craig Durgo-esque statement) In the tradition of Durgo, I saw sculptures that looked like -- two triangles next to smaller triangles with a triangular triangle on top. Pythagorus would be proud.

Bye in French

 

Hi! I'm back.
I haven't written in a while because I've been cleaning my boat. Stupid Egypt got it so stupid dirty.

Now I'm done cleaning my boat and I smell like algae and feet with a little bit of salt and gasoline. I'm going to bottle it, call it Noni juice and see how many dumb yuppies I can get to drink it. Sorry, I'm a little crabby.

Speaking of crabs, don't let TJ know that The Deadliest Season II started on the Discovery Channel...It's her favorite show in the universe and I'm afraid she'd jump ship to go back to the states to see it if she knew it was on.

I'm going to clean up now and party with Greek people...my GOD there are some beautiful men here. There are also stinky, slimy men and skinny cats here.

Has anyone yet translated TJ's so-called bilingual post?
I have a sneeking suspicion that the french part of the post is not directly translating the English part of the post. This is mostly because I learned from Chau that TJ only learned 3 years worth of French, and that was in middle school.

We're almost in Greece!! And their second language isn't French either.

coco y leche means coconut (there, now my post is bilingual too)

Hi all... Unlike TJ, I'm not going to profess my love of boy bands...I'm just signing off for the week because our connection will not hold up as we sail to our next destination.
Most of you "primitive screwheads" to quote Bruce Campbell, don't post much more than once a month anyway, so HAH!

(see, that was tough love so you won't miss me)
byebye for a few days!